


To Follow Elua's Precept

by Tim (boywonder)



Category: Kushiel's Legacy - Jacqueline Carey
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-20
Updated: 2010-12-20
Packaged: 2017-10-13 21:52:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/142096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boywonder/pseuds/Tim
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Blessed Elua's precept was not something that even he could deny lightly, when it came down to it. Both of them learned that lesson over and over again, that night, and in the weeks that followed.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	To Follow Elua's Precept

**Author's Note:**

  * For [miaoujones](https://archiveofourown.org/users/miaoujones/gifts).



"Everything I have done, I have done for you, my lord. Will you not do this one thing for me?"

Delaunay's hands stayed at the boy's waist, though tension wound its way up his arms. He stood, almost afraid to move, as if Alcuin were some rare butterfly that had perched upon him and might be stirred to flight by the merest breath. Though a man who prided himself on eloquence, he was caught now without the words to say. How had he read this incorrectly? Surely he could not have missed this. Surely, it could not be.

Ah, and yet, it _was_. Alcuin stood before him plainly, the need vivid in his eyes, unashamed to be at last revealed. Yet how could Delaunay act? He had raised the boy these many years, raised him nearly as a son, and any desirous thoughts he might have once had for the boy had long been buried. Yet hadn’t he felt it, once, when this had begun in earnest? Hadn’t there been some spark of jealousy mixed with pride when the boy’s virgin-price was paid? But no. There should not be this between them. Surely the boy did not know what he asked. It was foolish, and dangerous, and Alcuin was his ward, of his household. He carried Delaunay’s _name_ , for Elua’s sake!

Yet in Blessed Elua’s eyes, perhaps those things did not matter so terribly. Did not his precept state only _love as thou wilt?_ Yet so simple a command could cause untold pain. How well had Delaunay learned that lesson. How bitterly well.

"My lord?" Alcuin whispered, and though his tone was only subtly changed, Delaunay could not mistake it. Alcuin, then, was afraid of rejection -- of denial. Was that why he had done nothing to show his own desire? He had been raised to do just the opposite, after all; he could invoke desire in almost anyone, and he could certainly pretend to show it in return. Yet this, Delaunay knew, was no farce. Perhaps it had been there, perhaps he had even known it, on some deep level, but he had forced himself not to see. Denied it so deeply that now, confronted with the importance of it, he was utterly lost.

Their previous, chaste kiss still lingered on his lips. And so Delaunay did not answer with words, then, but bent to kiss Alcuin again. This time, the kiss was meant to last. Delaunay allowed some small bit of the tension in his arms to release as he drew Alcuin flush against him, inwardly surprised by his own desire. Yet perhaps it was not _that_ surprising, in the end. Alcuin's body all but molded to his own, and the boy's lips parted to let his tongue pass between them without resistance. In that instant, when the kiss became real, he was lost to his own feelings.

He had sworn once, never to do such a thing again. He had sworn that he would never give himself to another, that his heart would be barred so no one might ever pass and trample where once his prince had lain. But Alcuin, dear, sweet, damned Alcuin, had always known how to wear down Delaunay’s shields. How should this final one be so terribly different?

"Alcuin," he breathed, the name barely whispered against the boy's lips.

"My lord," came the return, predictable, almost teasing in tone. "Is this your answer, then?"

Delaunay rested his forehead against Alcuin's, and his hands came up to cradle the boy's face between them. Ah, but he was no longer a boy, was he? He had not been for quite some time, though it was hard to think of him as a man, even now.

"We ought not," Delaunay said, but his heart was not in his words.

"Give me one night," Alcuin said, "and I will not ask more of you." It was a request, but he was not pleading, Delaunay was satisfied to note. Although the boy clearly did not wish for rejection here -- and, indeed, feared it -- he would accept it if it were to be so. _Good._

Delaunay drew back, and shook his head, holding Alcuin’s eyes with a solemn gaze. "Ah, though you ask it so sweetly, that is something I cannot do.  Give you but one night? You might as well ask me to give you but one star in the sky to light all your evenings forevermore. No, Alcuin, I will not, _cannot_ give you _only_ one night."

For a moment, the words were lost on the boy, and his eyebrows knit in pain, confusion… Yet it passed quickly, for Alcuin had always been the first to catch that which was not said aloud, and understanding washed over his expression like the rising dawn. Delaunay felt the boy’s breath catch, a moment of startled triumph before he regained his self-control.

"Then give me longer, my lord."

Delaunay sighed and kissed the boy again, deeper, hungrier, drawing him toward the couch that nestled at the library’s heart. He gave no admission aloud, but he did not need to. Let his actions be better answer than his words could ever be. Let him take this unexpected gift so earnestly offered. Let him open the gate to his heart this once, at last, to the one who would walk through it with reverence.

Alcuin followed, of course, willingly. His hands moved along Delaunay's shirt, pulling at the fastenings, never allowing their lips to part. He had been trained to this, and though he had not wanted it, he had taken to it easily enough. And now, with the man he had given everything for, there was nothing false in his actions, nothing forced in his desire.

Delaunay drew back first, looking down into Alucin's eyes. That small smile still played on the boy's lips, and though Delaunay had seen him smile many times, there was something different in this one. Delaunay found himself returning it, unable to remain unaffected now that they had begun…whatever it was.

He sat back on the couch, pulling Alcuin to stand in front of him. "You are certain, Alcuin, that this is what you want?" he asked, though he was aware that the words were more formality than anything.

Alcuin nodded, once. "More than I think you realize, my lord."

Delaunay's lips pursed together for a minute. "There is no need for formality here," he said, a little less lightly than perhaps he meant to.

"I am aware of that, my lord," Alcuin said, eyes sparkling. Before Delaunay could answer him, he leaned in and resumed their kiss. Delaunay's hands came up to tangle - gently - in the boy's hair. He was a little perturbed by Alcuin's response to his remark on formality, but not enough to stop this from continuing.

Alcuin pushed Delaunay's shirt down, off his shoulders, and he did not stop there. Delaunay was not content to simply sit and allow Alcuin to do all the work. He stood, again, and removed the remainder of the boy's clothes, even as Alcuin's deft fingers danced across his skin.

Though Alcuin would have been content to allow Delaunay to lead their dance, he had been holding back his desire for years. He pushed Delaunay back onto the couch. Delaunay, for his part, obliged him. He was both entertained and entranced by Alcuin's slight show of forcefulness, and he allowed the boy to continue.

Without pretense, shame, or hesitation, Alcuin lowered himself to his knees to perform the _languisement_. He was adept at his craft, of course, and his skill was fueled by his passion. Delaunay's head fell back against the cushions as Alcuin's mouth worked magic on him. Before he could finish, however, he pulled the boy up and kissed him.

"I will not deny you," he said, as their lips parted, met, and parted again, "but you mustn't deny me. I am not a young man any longer."

Alcuin's lips curved back into that smile against his lord's mouth, and he nodded.

"I would never deny you anything, my lord," he said, his voice growing husky with desire.

Delaunay pulled Alcuin to straddle his legs. "And yet, you _do_ deny me, Alcuin."

Alcuin rested his hands on Delaunay's shoulders, tracing patterns there with his fingers, and did not answer. After a moment, however, he raised his gaze to meet his lord's. He shook his head, gently.

"I told you, I would never," he said, softly. The teasing was gone from his tone entirely now. He reached down and took Delaunay's hands, guiding them to where he wanted them to be.

" _Anafiel_."

Delaunay's eyes fluttered shut. To think one word could hold such power over him! After that, he found that there was nothing he would deny Alcuin, either. Not tonight, and not again. Blessed Elua's precept was not something that even he could deny lightly, when it came down to it. Both of them learned that lesson over and over again, that night, and in the weeks that followed.

~Fin~


End file.
